Last week I posted a summer break survival guide for parents because let’s be real, summer break isn’t all puppy dogs and rainbows. Don’t get me wrong– I LOVE summer break with my kids. I love the more relaxed schedule, seeing my kids more every day and getting to spend more time with them. I’m always sad when summer break ends, and it always seems to go by too fast.
But summer break can be challenging too, as routines and the normal daily flow is disturbed. What I didn’t write about last week is how much more challenging all of this can be when you’re the parent of a child with ADHD. Let me preface all of this by saying that I love my child with ADHD to the moon and back; she’s beautiful, smart, and hilarious; seriously, she is so funny. She’s just a really, really cool kid, and I’m so proud of how far she’s come in the last few years. She’s also an amazing big sister- especially to her two littlest sisters. However, her attention span is not her strong suit. I’m seeing all of these Pinterest moms post photos of kids peacefully reading under trees while sipping lemonade, and I’m googling “Is it too early for wine?” at 9:47 AM. Kidding, kidding… or am I? The world may never know.
Seriously though. Now that we’re a couple of weeks into summer, I’m feeling especially challenged. I guess I’d blocked out just how hard it is. To be fair, last summer was a whirlwind– we moved houses, did some major renovations, oh, and I was pregnant. This summer, we don’t have quite so many “distractions.” I also have a threenager, so when you throw in her tantrums we’re all in for a treat. In a matter of two weeks I’ve went from being mom to being a full-time cruise director, referee, snack dispenser and search -and-rescue team all rolled into one. It’s been a whirlwind, let me tell you. At least I can take comfort in knowing I’m not alone in this.
When Structure Goes Out the Window (Literally)
Remember that beautiful school-year routine? Wake up at 6:30, breakfast at 7:00, backpack by the door at 7:30? Yeah, that’s dead now. Summer break arrives like a toddler with a permanent marker—suddenly everything you thought you had under control is chaos, and you’re not sure how it happened so fast.
Your ADHD child, who thrived on knowing exactly when math started and when lunch was served, now faces the terrifying prospect of “free time.” And by terrifying, I mean terrifying for YOU, because they’ve just asked “What are we doing today?” for the fourteenth time before you’ve had your first cup of coffee. 14 is not an exaggeration. I counted this morning. The same kid who complained about having to wake up for school is now bouncing on your bed at 6 AM asking if today we can go swimming and bowling and to the library and maybe to Target because she has a gift card to use (spoiler alert: it’s Friday, and you haven’t even discussed ANY of these things).
The really frustrating thing? Sometimes (and by sometimes, I mean most of the time), you can do all the fun things, and it’s STILL not enough. My sweet ADHD kiddo started asking me on Monday if we could go bowling. I worked Monday and Tuesday, so those days were a no-go for bowling. Wednesday was garage clean out day (not fun, but it had to be done!), followed by swimming and eating pizza by the pool. On Thursday I told my kids I’d take them bowling. Before we even backed out of the driveway, I heard “after we go bowling can we go swimming?” from you-know-who. She then proceeded to ask about swimming every 3-5 minutes through two games of bowling. Bruh. Just be in the moment for 60 minutes– please, before mom loses her mind!!
The Energy Olympics Have Begun
If you thought your child had energy during the school year, congratulations—you ain’t seen nothing yet. Without PE class, recess, and the general exhaustion of academic focus, your little dynamo is now operating at full capacity from dawn until… well, who are we kidding? They don’t actually wind down.
You’ll find yourself researching trampoline parks at 7 AM, calculating if swimming lessons at three different locations will tire them out enough for an afternoon quiet time (they won’t), and seriously considering whether a home rock-climbing wall counts as educational. Your browser history now looks like someone preparing for an extreme sports competition: “obstacle courses near me,” “how much exercise is too much exercise for kids,” and “do bounce houses come in soundproof versions?” I had to close 365 open tabs on my phone this morning, most of which were pertaining to entertainment for my kids.
Screen Time: The Devil You Know
Let’s address the elephant in the room—or rather, the glowing rectangle that your child has somehow fused with permanently. During the school year, screen time had natural boundaries. Now you’re facing the dreaded summer screen time negotiations, which feel like hostage situations where the hostage-taker has better arguments than you do.
“But Mom, Roblox is educational!” they’ll argue, while you wonder if Roblox is actually preparing them for a future STEM career or just rotting their brain. You’ll set timers, create elaborate reward charts, and maybe even hide the iPad in your bedroom like it’s contraband, only to find yourself handing it over at 4 PM because you need thirty minutes to make dinner without someone asking you to watch them do the same cartwheel seventeen times.
Social Situations: The Wild West of Summer
Summer social interactions are like regular social interactions, but with less supervision and more potential for someone to end up crying in a sandbox. Your ADHD child’s impulse control, which was carefully managed in the classroom setting, is now being tested by every playground interaction, pool party, and neighborhood bike ride.
You’ll become fluent in preemptive social coaching: “Remember, we don’t tell other kids their ideas are boring, even if they are,” and “If someone says no to tag, we don’t chase them anyway.” You’ll perfect the art of the apologetic parent smile when your kid interrupts another child’s story for the third time, and you’ll develop a sixth sense for when you need to swoop in before things go sideways.
The Great Medication Debate
Summer brings the annual question: To medicate or not to medicate? Some parents decide on a “medication vacation,” which sounds relaxing until you realize it means YOUR vacation from peaceful moments has also officially ended. Others maintain the routine but worry about appetite issues when your kid is supposed to be growing and enjoying summer treats.
Either way, you’ll spend at least three Google searches wondering if you’re making the right choice, and at least one conversation with another parent that starts with “I’m not judging, but…” (spoiler: they’re totally judging, and you’re judging them right back).
Finding Your Summer Survival Strategy
The good news? You will figure this out (and by you I also mean me… we). Maybe not elegantly, and definitely not according to any Pinterest board, but you’ll develop our own summer rhythm. You’ll discover that 10 AM is too early for the playground in July, that pool noodles are surprisingly effective bribery tools, and that “quiet time” doesn’t have to be quiet—it just has to happen in their bedroom for one sacred hour.
You”ll learn to pack snacks like you’re preparing for the apocalypse, because an ADHD child’s hunger strikes without warning and with the intensity of a natural disaster. You’ll master the art of redirecting energy (“Want to race? Great! Race to clean up those Barbies!”) and you’ll become surprisingly creative at turning chores into games.
The Real Truth About Summer Survival
Here’s what no one tells you: It’s okay to count down the days until school starts. It’s okay to let them watch more TV than usual sometimes. It’s okay to order pizza for lunch because you spent the morning preventing them from turning the backyard into a mud wrestling arena.
Most importantly, it’s okay to acknowledge that parenting an ADHD child through summer break is genuinely exhausting work that deserves recognition, support, and the occasional adult beverage after bedtime.
Summer break will end (I promise it will, even though it feels infinite right now). School will resume, routines will return, and you’ll probably find yourself missing some of these chaotic moments– I already know I will. But until then, take it one day at a time, celebrate the small victories, and remember: we’re not just surviving summer break—we’re giving our children memories of a parent who showed up, even when showing up meant hiding in the bathroom for five minutes to remember what silence sounds like.
